Recently, I started Dusty Roads, a personal project which brings me back to the times of my childhood and teen days. It brings back all kinds of memories, good and bad.
Things seen and felt through the eyes of a child were much simpler. Now, when I think back of those times and start to understand things better, I feel a tinge of sadness that I have been out of touch with people who showered me with so much love and the fact that I never quite realised it before.
When I was young, I was very close to some of my extended family members. They took turns to care for me while my parents were at work. They are not physically or verbally expressive people, so there were never hugs and kisses or words like "I love you". Now when I look back at the gestures, I realise that they took very good care of me and protected me not because I was a responsibility to them, but because they genuinely loved their niece.
I also realise that the meals made and waited on me were nothing less than an act of love. Taking the time to shower a rebellious child and coaxing her to take an afternoon nap were never the easiest of jobs had there been no love. And despite some of them being low or average income earners then, they would fish out dollars in their pockets to buy me things I demanded. As a child, you're always unreasonable when you know not the value of money. And yet, they were always generous with me.
As I reminisce and understand their love today, I feel a deep urge to tell them how much I appreciate them. But some things don't change, since we as a family are not expressive, I don't know how to tell or show them without the awkwardness that may come with it.
Things seen and felt through the eyes of a child were much simpler. Now, when I think back of those times and start to understand things better, I feel a tinge of sadness that I have been out of touch with people who showered me with so much love and the fact that I never quite realised it before.
When I was young, I was very close to some of my extended family members. They took turns to care for me while my parents were at work. They are not physically or verbally expressive people, so there were never hugs and kisses or words like "I love you". Now when I look back at the gestures, I realise that they took very good care of me and protected me not because I was a responsibility to them, but because they genuinely loved their niece.
I also realise that the meals made and waited on me were nothing less than an act of love. Taking the time to shower a rebellious child and coaxing her to take an afternoon nap were never the easiest of jobs had there been no love. And despite some of them being low or average income earners then, they would fish out dollars in their pockets to buy me things I demanded. As a child, you're always unreasonable when you know not the value of money. And yet, they were always generous with me.
As I reminisce and understand their love today, I feel a deep urge to tell them how much I appreciate them. But some things don't change, since we as a family are not expressive, I don't know how to tell or show them without the awkwardness that may come with it.
2 comments:
Once again, a great blog. Reading it reminded me about my own childhood memories. Thanks.
hi leonard. thank you...some of our childhood memories are most precious, aren't they? :)
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