I don't know if it's just me or there are others like me.
When having encountered some not so pleasant times with someone, you decide you don't like him or her. He/she seems evil. Evidence are everywhere, not just hearsay evidence, but directly witnessed yourself. Not only that, but you've even been the victim of some nasty behaviour from the person.
And so it goes on and you've made up your mind you dislike the person and he/she is definitely someone to stay away from, never to be trusted. But circumstances bring you to be in constant contact with him/her and there is no way out.
Then one day, you notice that the person is being nice. It doesn't happen over-night. You actually see the gradual progression. Others have noticed too. But the others, like you who don't like him/her, maintain their reservations and only say "Let's see how soon it'll go back to the old ways". In other words, no one believes that he/she can change to be nice.
So you too adopt the same defensive position to wait and see. Things are going OK and the bad times you've seen aren't happening so far. Now you start thinking, "Can a leopard really change its spots?" There is still doubt whether the change is real, whether it is just a manipulation, whether it is sustainable.
I have experienced that. And you know what? Sometimes life seems happier if you don't doubt and just take things at face value. Just believe that people can be good and that people can change for the better. Sure it is still not going to be as perfect as you want it to be, but as long as things are pleasant, that is quite enough to call it a good day.
I think most people find it hard to trust because it means letting your guard down and by doing that you get bumped when things don't go right. It is a natural defense mechanism and it takes effort to overcome it.
Nonetheless, I'm one who think that life is short and unpredictable. So if I can have a moment to be happy, I'll take it. I'm not perfect and sometimes I may go back to my old ways of judging too quickly and building up my barriers, but I will try.
Everyone deserves a second chance. Besides, if one day I'm the nasty one and realise that I need to change, I too hope that I can be sincerely given a second chance.
When having encountered some not so pleasant times with someone, you decide you don't like him or her. He/she seems evil. Evidence are everywhere, not just hearsay evidence, but directly witnessed yourself. Not only that, but you've even been the victim of some nasty behaviour from the person.
And so it goes on and you've made up your mind you dislike the person and he/she is definitely someone to stay away from, never to be trusted. But circumstances bring you to be in constant contact with him/her and there is no way out.
Then one day, you notice that the person is being nice. It doesn't happen over-night. You actually see the gradual progression. Others have noticed too. But the others, like you who don't like him/her, maintain their reservations and only say "Let's see how soon it'll go back to the old ways". In other words, no one believes that he/she can change to be nice.
So you too adopt the same defensive position to wait and see. Things are going OK and the bad times you've seen aren't happening so far. Now you start thinking, "Can a leopard really change its spots?" There is still doubt whether the change is real, whether it is just a manipulation, whether it is sustainable.
I have experienced that. And you know what? Sometimes life seems happier if you don't doubt and just take things at face value. Just believe that people can be good and that people can change for the better. Sure it is still not going to be as perfect as you want it to be, but as long as things are pleasant, that is quite enough to call it a good day.
I think most people find it hard to trust because it means letting your guard down and by doing that you get bumped when things don't go right. It is a natural defense mechanism and it takes effort to overcome it.
Nonetheless, I'm one who think that life is short and unpredictable. So if I can have a moment to be happy, I'll take it. I'm not perfect and sometimes I may go back to my old ways of judging too quickly and building up my barriers, but I will try.
Everyone deserves a second chance. Besides, if one day I'm the nasty one and realise that I need to change, I too hope that I can be sincerely given a second chance.
1 comments:
hmmmm.... good for you to be so positive...u will live happier too. Look at me...chuckle!
a rare sanguine
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